"'Dear Diary, my teenage angst bullshit now has a body count.'- Veronica, Heathers"
Stupid Wal-Mart
Thu, 09/17/2009 - 21:27
Granted, this is 100% purely my fault, but it wouldn't have happened if Wal-Mart wasn't so stupid and corporate, somehow.
I went to buy cereal for my kids. The one they like is the store brand cinnamon toast crunch. It's on the bottom row. So I bend down to get it and slam my forehead against the middle shelf. Right across my brow-line, right over my eyebrows.
I look like a neanderthal, with my puffy swollen eyebrows and shadowed eyes...
So WAl-Mart is now stupid.
But it's cool, because I found Grace on sale for $9.
(I'm really not as shallow and retarded as I sound. Brain is fried from a two-week allergy attack from pine pollen.)
Fri, 09/18/2009 - 21:23
#2
I told them... My demon-child, Abby, immediately asked if you had a penis. Then she insisted that SHE has a penis. So I'm incredibly flabbergasted and concerned. I found out she also asked her teacher if she has a penis. I'm thinking it's time for a certain conversation...
Yes, I wacked myself HARD. Swelling isn't so bad today on the left side, but the upper ridge of my right eye socket is incredibly sore. If it's still swollen tomorrow, I'm going for x-rays. If there's a fracture, would you believe it's actually the second time I've fractured my eye-hole bones?
Sun, 09/20/2009 - 10:55
#3
It is completely Wal-mart's fault for being retarded.
Did you hit yourself THAT hard?
Your kids have good taste in cereals. let them know I said that.
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